Wednesday, November 03, 2004

You Choose the News

Like any reporter worth his salt, Skor has prepared two different copies of today's story in order to cover all his bases. Since the election still hasn't been "called" for sure yet, and in order to avoid an embarrassing miscalculation like the one pictured above, Skor has decided just to post both copies of today's story.

On a side note, it is quite interesting that the "mainstream media" is refusing to call Ohio for George Bush, when Bush's lead in Ohio of 136,221 votes is actually bigger than John Kerry's lead in Pennsylvania of 121,818 votes. Now why would that be? Hmm... Well it certainly isn't media bias. Of course not.

Well, without further speculation, I present to you today's story. And, today's story. You choose.

Condolences for Senator NotBush

My condolences to Senator and former candidate NotBush. It was a long, hard battle, but in the end, Senator NotBush just couldn't garner enough votes. Either in the popular vote or the Electoral College. Too bad. Now we can get on with another four years of indignant, rage-filled vitriol against Bush, without all these electoral distractions. But for right now, hang your head in shame, Senator NotBush. November 2nd just wasn't your day.

Congratulations President-Elect NotBush!

Congratulations to President-Elect NotBush! It was a long, hard battle, and in the end, Senator NotBush just managed to get more votes. Both in the popular vote and the Electoral College! Good job. Now we can begin the four-year process of disillusioning everyone who thinks that NotBush is going to be somehow inexplicably better than Bush. But for right now, bask in your glory President-Elect NotBush. November 2nd was your day.


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