Tuesday, March 08, 2005

Project CRAP: Week 9 Report

Click here for the explanation of Project CRAP
Box size: 15" wide by 11" tall by 9" deep.
Total Weight of CRAP: 7.05 lbs
Depth of CRAP: 3 1/3"
New Pieces of CRAP: 12
Total Pieces of CRAP: 109
LowLight of the Week: Fox Movies wins this week's LowLight "award" for a number of reasons. 1 - This might be the worst-targeted ad I've ever seen. Why does Fox think that Skor would be into Strawberry Shortcake and Garfield? Does Skor look like the kind of person that enjoys musicals, too? Skor thinks not. 2 - "GREAT FAMILY ENTERTAINMENT FOR EASTER" Can someone enlighten Skor as to what exactly Oklahoma! and The Agony and the Ecstasy have to do with the celebration of the risen Lord? They don't even have anything to do with Commercial Easter™, with the bunnies and the eggs and such! Or maybe it's just been too long (read: never) since Skor last saw those movies.
LowLight of Week 9: Fox Movies
Click for a larger version of this week's winner.

Dishonorable Mention: It was a close contest this week for LowLight, but in the end Skor just couldn't let Verizon DSL "win" the award three times in just 9 weeks. It's not that they didn't try, though. Oh, they tried. This piece of CRAP even had fake burnt edges. Seriously, they were really curvy and stuff. Listen now, Verizon DSL: SKOR WILL NOT BUY YOUR SERVICE. NOT NOW, NOT EVER.
Week 9 Dishonorable Mention: Verizon DSL
Click for a larger version of this week's loser.

Comments: You probably have noticed that the inches seems to go in spurts. This is probably due to the size of the box relative to the size of most of the CRAP. It doesn't really settle in evenly, and the CRAP on the edges of the box isn't as tightly stacked as the CRAP in the middle. Because this week's report was posted a bit late, Skor will grace you with this impromptu poem about CRAP:
In the mailbox, straight to the recycle.
Oh what a gigantic waste.
Movies from Fox, perpetuate the cycle.
Skor discards it all with haste.
CRAP sucks.

CRAP Box at 9 Weeks

Categories: Features


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